June 2011
11 posts
Gold Star
I just got through the first five days of no smoking PLUS surprise PM-fucking-S.
I’m basically better than Mother Theresa.
Sexy Smoker of the Day
Harry Potter. That’s so Ravenclaw!
But He IS Into Me.
You know how in He’s Just Not That Into You, Ginnifer Goodwin’s character think she’s the exception to the rule? And how dudes just have issues and would otherwise like her insane, crazy, terrifyingly co-dependent character?
That’s how I am. But I’m dating Camel Lights. Sure, EVERYONE gets cancer. But not me. I won’t get it. Because he IS into me, he’s...
“It’s easy to quit smoking. I’ve done it hundreds of times.”
– Mark Twain
I feel you, homeboy.
Sexy Smoker of the Day
Jed Bartlett. Smoke on, Sexy.
The Jitter Bug
You know after you’ve watched The Killing? Or, like, The Believer? And you’re all “Oh SHIT Ryan Gosling is crazy good as a Neo-Nazi / Self-Hating Jew. I wish I had a cigarette.”?
That’s where I’m at right now. Having a personal Holocaust.
Wait.
Does this mean I can never use my Hillary Clinton “We Are The President” lighter ever again? Fuck.
Tongue-Kissing
Things I’d tongue-kiss for a cigarette:
Kim Jong-Il
A cactus
A cockroach
Your butthole
An albino
Jackie Earle Haley
Day One
I quit smoking today. So far, the worst decision I’ve made to date. That includes that decision to dance with a suspected rapist at the foot of the Sacre Coeur.